Revelation

I have been praying for something for a long time; a deeper revelation of God. “Father, please reveal more of Yourself to me,” has been the simple cry of my heart.

This morning I have been awakened from another restless night of sleep. It is early. My thoughts are clear and the house is quiet. I am not distracted by anything or anyone; though part of me wishes for a distraction.

God has given me a revelation. He has shown me that sometimes His revelations are eye-opening exposures of the parts of me that must change so that I may become more like Him.

This is not the revelation I was hoping for.

I was hoping for a deeper revelation of God’s love. I was hoping for something warm and fuzzy.

The more He reveals to me about Him, the more the parts of me that don’t match Him are leaking out, shocking even myself with the truth of their disclosure.

He is showing me that to hide His Word in my heart requires much more than simply reading His Word and knowing it in my head. A person can memorize and know many things without the knowledge changing his or her heart.

As God, in His goodness, has slowly been revealing the darkness within, I have wanted to keep it a secret. I have longed to be made pure and holy and righteous in the sanctuary of my own home. Me and God’s little secret. I wish to hide away from the world until I am “all better.”

Thankfully, God is not revealing my sins to punish me or to make me feel like giving up. He’s answering the deepest cry of my heart- to be more like Him. Not even a hint of impurity is hidden from Him. My unwillingness to admit my darkness does not fool Him.

During this time of “revelation,” I am drawn to God’s Word like never before. I am desperate to be made clean and holy. One thing I know fully; I cannot change myself.

I know that I am not alone. James says it well when he says that “we all stumble in many ways.” (Jas. 3:2) Paul shares in Romans that we are to “not let sin reign in our mortal body so that we obey its evil desires.” (Rom. 6:12) We are also told that we are “sons of the light and sons of the day. We do not belong to the night or to darkness.” (I Thess 5:5).

Our Inner World, the very core of our being—is the place where the Holy Spirit resides. The Spirit is not timid. We must not ignore that which leaks out and is brought to the light. The Spirit is power and love and self-discipline.

As we continue to ask God for a deeper revelation of who He is, I trust that He will continue to open our eyes to those parts of us that do not match Him.

Perhaps that is why He instructs us to “love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.” (I Pt. 4:7)

God will not relent until He has every part of us —are we willing to trust Him with the darkest parts of our hearts?

This is not the time to hide in our secret worlds. Our enemy, the devil, is prowling around like a roaring lion seeking someone to devour. It’s time to hold onto Truth and learn to pray to the God of our souls for a deeper revelation.

Light always overcomes darkness.

Stay the Course...

Sheila Cote