In The Beginning

I don’t know about you, but I sometimes find myself going through a time of wrestling with God over issues I thought were resolved years ago about life, myself, and my beliefs.   

This week, after many weeks of feeling distance between myself and God, something finally broke within me.  This breaking point caught me off guard.

Here’s what happened.

After a long sabbatical from my first love, running, I decided it was time to see if I could still run.  I ached for the familiarity and comfort running has given me over the years.

Stay with me.

In the beginning, when I was a youth, running was the venue with which I was most able to clearly hear my Father’s voice.  I don’t know why, other than after the natural rhythm of breathing ensued, my thoughts and attention would turn to God; He in turn met me time and again on those pavement-pounding runs.  Pain found the exit door from my soul, joy was felt, tears were shed, and sometimes I would come to a dead halt from the sheer intensity of God’s presence.

This week as I slipped through the front doors of my new fitness club, I found my way upstairs to the indoor track.  Anonymity never felt as wonderful as I turned on my iPod and did what I have done thousands of times before: I ran.

Breathing found its rhythm, I found peace, and my Father was ever present as He has been since the day I took my first run.  Suddenly questions I had been wrestling with for weeks found answers; my heart could all but contain the joy of the moment.

In the beginning, God was a friend to Adam and Eve.  He longs for friendship with us too.  In the beginning, David’s heart was undivided toward God as a simple shepherd boy.  In the beginning, Saul chose to obey God but once he rejected God’s word, God rejected him as king.  As time passed and different opportunities presented themselves to either serve God or serve self; decisions had to be made.  As life became more complex, David and Saul often forgot the God they had known in the beginning. Saul chose a path of self-sufficiency but David’s heart returned to God.

In the beginning of a friendship, we are able to see the beauty of another's life.  In the beginning of marriage, we believe in a happily ever after. In the beginning of being a parent we believe in all the best for our children.  In the beginning of our relationship with God, we trust Him with childlike faith.  Then time passes, different opportunities present themselves, and we must make a decision.  

In the middle of life’s storms, it’s easy to forget our starting points.

If you, like myself, have been struggling to find answers to questions and don’t know where to turn—go back to the beginning.  Whatever you do that brings your heart back to its first love, ushering you into the presence of your Maker; do that thing.  Hiking a mountain, lying by a river, sitting in a deer stand, flying a plane, planting a garden; do that which you did in the beginning and watch what happens.

Relationships will rekindle, love will remember its point of commitment, dreams will refocus from blurry to clear, and hopes long forgotten will be given new life.

In the beginning things made sense and life was simple.

Because in the beginning there was God.

Stay the Course...

Sheila