Tipping Point

Last week, I experienced a moment in my industry that was the final straw. It culminated 13 years of striving, feeling like I was never doing enough, and constantly comparing myself to others. This moment, this feeling of being broken, was the tipping point. Merriam-Webster defines a tipping point as “the critical point in a situation, process, or system beyond which a significant and often unstoppable effect or change takes place.” 

At first, I was angry, followed by mixed emotions. 

However, in the moment of finally coming to the end of myself, something else was birthed within me. When I finally laid my real estate career at the feet of Jesus, I experienced a profound sense of relief and freedom. Over the next several days, peace filled me in ways I cannot describe. I no longer felt concern over my success as a realtor or the lack thereof. I no longer felt that my identity was attached to a title. I no longer felt led to compare myself to anyone and no longer cared how much money I could earn.

I enjoyed one of the most peaceful weekends, indulging in the things that bring me joy—things that may or may not bring joy to others. In the sanctuary of the 5 acres God has blessed me and my husband with, I saw the blessings of every little detail of God’s goodness to us. And I realized that true identity is found outside of societal expectations.

Yesterday, I had a candid conversation with a good friend. We touched on true identity and asked ourselves, “When was the last time you felt accepted for who you truly are, outside of what you do for a living or how much you earn?” This introspective discussion led my friend to share a beautiful recent experience when he had felt like his true self—the experience had been so sacred that it had brought him to tears.

This morning, as I watched the sunrise from my favorite bench, I reflected on the last several days. As I sat in silence, I felt God’s presence. 

Instead of praying for everyday things, my heart was touched as the Spirit revealed to me the goodness of God in my life and that of my husband and our family. Instead of seeing disappointment and feeling unfulfilled, I could see the beauty of God’s blessings and provisions. I looked over the prairie and saw the morning dew glistening through the sunrise on the tall grass. Glancing to my left sat the old Airstream camper my husband and I recently purchased to renovate—a dream and goal we both share. Behind me sits our garden, tucked in with a fence my husband built to ensure we receive more of the garden’s bounty than the deer and bunnies who call our land home. I thought of all the meals we shared and the many hours spent preserving the food—both for our family and to share with others. 

For the first time in a long time, I realized that God has not called us to an easy life filled with fun and more money than we know what to do with—He has called us to a life of obedience. A life that remembers the truth of our identities; we are called to serve, love, and care for people. Jesus never questioned his true identity or calling. He never strived for the easy path, and I’m sure there were many days when He was exhausted and weary. He was never given the security of a home on earth to put down roots—His “forever home” was in heaven with His Father. So is ours. 

I sat unhurried on the bench—a grateful daughter— who finally understood her true identity: daughter of God, wife of Jesse, mother, sister, Mimi, friend—and realtor. Life is not a game of comparisons or competition. Instead, life is about trusting that God has you where you are for reasons that may not always make sense. His love for us and His plans for our lives will never fail. Nothing is more beautiful than feeling the peace of being one's true self in the presence of the One who created each of us for His pleasure and purpose.

Stay the Course…

Sheila

I Thessalonians 4:11 “Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life, to mind your own business and to work with your hands, just as we told you, so that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders and so that you will not be dependent on anybody.”

Authentic

Merriam-Webster definition: Not false or imitation: REAL, ACTUAL. True to one’s own personality, spirit, or character.

I’ve been struggling to put words on paper recently—my own words. With so many programs created to “assist” a person with their grammar, or AI available to write your thoughts, answer your questions, do your research for you, or create anything you ask it to create—you would think all of these “assists” would make a writer feel relieved. But instead, I feel grieved. And convicted to a deeper level of authenticity. I agree with myself that I should strive not for perfection but for authenticity. 

I believe that God has given each person gifts and talents. I believe this because it is written in His Word. How do I find it in His Word without using Google or asking AI? I open my Bible and go to the back where the Master Index or Concordance is located, and from there, go to a word that I may want to study in various scriptures—find the word in alphabetical order, and then study the scriptures associated with that specific word or thought. The process takes time, requires delving into the scriptures, and can often lead to rabbit trails when reading one scripture, which may cause you to want to understand another subject. 

However, it’s in the PROCESS of studying the Word of God that we not only learn God’s truths and character but also learn from Him the truth of our own existence and how to live lives that mirror the character qualities of Christ. He tells us how to live in an evil world (Romans 12:2, Col. 2:20-22), how we are new creations in Christ, Christ’s ambassadors (II Cor. 5:17 & 20), how we have been given the spirit of wisdom and revelation SO THAT WE MAY KNOW HIM BETTER, the incomparable great power he has given those who believe (Eph. 1:17-19), how to live a life worthy of the calling we have received (Eph 4:1), how to do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than ourselves (Phil. 2:3), to preach the Word and be prepared in season and out of season; to correct, rebuke and encourage with great patience and careful instruction (II Tim. 4:2)….and dozens upon dozens of other Words from God pertaining to life, death and godliness.

I found all of the above scriptures by looking up a single word in the back of one of my Dad’s worn and tattered Bibles, which I found in the back of the closet in his office on my last visit home after his death. The back of the Bible contains so many other studies, including character studies, various Bible readings, illustrated studies such as “Journeys of Abraham” or “Life of David,” and so on. 

Every word and story in the Bible is authentic, not false or imitation: REAL, ACTUAL.

In a world that is no longer a “what you see is what you get” world—I crave authenticity, don’t you? I love the feel and the smell of a tattered Bible—the joy of “finding” each book of the Bible. I find my desire to become more authentic within the pages and stories of those who have gone before me. In the journeys, lives, prophecies, history of the Early Church, and last days of Jesus—I discover the true purpose of my own existence. While digging out the gold of the Word, I am learning the gifts I have been given and how to stay “true to my personality, spirit, and character”—living an authentic life of service to my Creator and the most faithful lover of my soul.

Stay the course…

Sheila

You Know Me

"O Lord, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all of my ways." Psalm 139:1&2

A few days ago, while hiking the trails of a 400-acre forest with my dog, as I do several times a week, I had a freak accident. In a nutshell, at about the halfway point of our hour-long hike, I took a fall while attempting to run past another hiker and his dog. My dog pulled hard and fast to the left while I was running straight, and ultimately, I fell hard, landing on my upper arm. The pain instantly permeated my body, and I knew in a moment that I was in a precarious position.

While the kind hiker helped me remember to breathe and kept me calm, I eventually sat down, leaning against a tree while he went for help. After contacting my husband to tell him where I was in case I blacked out, I was utterly alone on the trail with my dog. I felt vulnerable--in a state of shock, I began to pray. My prayer could have been more eloquent. Instead, it went something like this: "Help me Jesus, help me Jesus, help me Jesus." 

Hiking the trails or hiking anywhere has always been where I feel most like my true self. When surrounded by His glorious creation, I am honest in my conversations with Him. Only moments earlier, I had thanked Him for His goodness to me, recalling all the ways He has blessed me and my family. And now, as I struggled to breathe, feeling like a tiny dot in a large forest, I felt His peace and presence. 

"Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast." Psalm 139-7-10

God is omnipresent—everywhere, in every place and time. To say that God is "present" is to say that he is here with us, really here, not absent. He is the creator of heaven and earth, meaning He is in every location. He is also the creator of time—one without a beginning or an end. He has been present in the world since its creation, and there will never be a time when He is absent. 

We are never lost to God. No matter where we go or what we do, He is present. Although He knows every detail about us, His ultimate desire and greatest gift is that He allows us to know Him, too. 

One of Jesus's last prayers perfectly describes this desire: "Father, the time has come. Glorify your Son, that your Son may glorify you. For you granted him authority over all people that he might give eternal life to all those you have given him. Now this is eternal life: that they may know you the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent. I have brought you glory on earth by completing the work you gave me to do. And now, Father, glorify me in your presence with the glory I had with you before the world began." John 17:1-5

Reflecting on my trail experience, I am humbled and thankful for those whom God brought along the path (literally!) to help. Although I suffered a fractured humerus (upper arm bone), hardships have a way of bringing us closer to His presence. His love hits differently from a broken place when we can see our utter need for more of Him more clearly. 

"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." Psalm 139:14

Stay the Course…

Sheila

Today’s Prayer: “Father, thank you for your omnipresence. It’s difficult to understand that time is different in heaven than how we view it on earth—without beginning or end. Father, I pray for those who have not yet accepted your gift of eternal life. Your Word tells us that by grace, we have been saved through faith. We know that faith does not come from ourselves, and it is not by works—it is a gift from You so that no one can boast. Your Word tells us that if we confess with our mouths, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in our hearts that You raised Jesus from the dead, we will be saved. Today, I pray for Your gift of salvation to anyone who cries out to You with this prayer. Our greatest joy on earth is to know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom You sent. Please draw us closer to You as we seek You and learn more about You through the gift of Your Spirit and the power of Your Word. In Jesus name, I pray, amen.”

Every End is a Start

Almost exactly three years ago, my father passed from this life into eternity. 

His departure was natural, beautiful, painful, and mysterious. 

Almost three years ago, I stopped writing for this blog. Instead, I began writing a monthly column for our local newspaper, an idea I proposed when our neighbors and world were still keeping social distance. 

I began to interview local community neighbors for a column called Hello Neighbor. Each month, my focus shifts off of myself and onto a different person or specific topic. I have met and interviewed people who are similar to myself and people who are strikingly different from myself—and in the process, I have learned more about myself than I have wanted to know. For instance, to understand another's story, my mouth needs to remain closed, and my focus must be fully absorbed in the life and heart of another. I don't need to agree or disagree with another's perspective. I have learned to listen to stories that transpire in the mud and muck of life, to storylines that twist and turn, and ultimately to a consistent conclusion that things are not what they appear to be; people are not always what they appear to be. 

Often, the most beautiful unfolding of another's story is what happens to the one telling their story out loud for possibly the first time. Almost always, there are tears, and sometimes, I am caught off guard when such a moment occurs. In telling our stories, we are transported back to a time that feels like it never happened and as if it just happened today. Our stories reveal our journey in such a way that the emotions connected with the journey also revisit us. Emotions connected to sharing stories about our younger selves may bring new revelations in the telling through the eyes of our older selves. 

I know of few things in my life that have been as great of a privilege to participate in than to be an audience to a person I have just met in listening to their story. I can ask questions when my interest is piqued, but mostly, I'm learning to hold my tongue and give undivided attention to a person God has placed in my path for such a moment. 

Although we live in a world that idolizes celebrities, where many focus their energy and attention on social media, being an influencer, or presenting ourselves in a way that makes us feel seen and essential—I realize that often the people who leave the most extraordinary legacy are the ones who are unaware of their influence and impact. The teachers who poured into their students, the artist who turned an old tire shop into a home and a gallery for local artists, high school sweethearts whose love was so deep that several years after an accident left his girlfriend paralyzed from the waist down, he still married her. Today, they celebrate decades of good memories together despite their journey's difficulties. 

In writing another's story, I have learned that life is lovely, beautiful, complex, and challenging regardless of who you are. Careers are meaningful, but family is more important. Traveling the world is fun, but being with the people you love is what you will remember at the end of your life. Photos of who you are in your youth may not resemble photos of who you are when there remains more road behind you than in front of you. We are no less beautiful in our older skin than the younger one, at least not to those who truly know us, especially not our Maker. Significance is not found in what we accomplish but in who we become due to our accomplishments. And most importantly, every end is a start. 

My father's end of life on this earth was a start to a new life in eternity, a story that I do not yet fully understand. As I reflect on his life—how he lived, how he spent his time, and what mattered to him—I can better understand the truth of who I am. In telling another's story, I have learned the beauty of humanity—we are all a messed-up mixture of glory and grime. 

Stay the Course… 

Sheila