El Roi

In the 16th Chapter of the first book of the Bible, Genesis, we meet an Egyptian maidservant named Hagar.

Unlike many of the big names in the Bible, Hagar's name might go unnoticed, yet she has quite a story to tell.

Abram (later known as Abraham) had received the promise of a child from God but as an old man already, the passage of time lent to Abram and Sarai's (later known as Sarah) decision to take matters into their own hands. Sarai told Abram to lie with her maidservant so that they could build a family through her, and so he did.

When Hagar became pregnant, she grew resentful toward Sarai. 

After Sarai mistreated her, she decided to run away. I'm not sure if it was the pregnancy hormones or a sudden lack of reality that gave Hagar the boldness to run away all by herself to the middle of nowhere, but run she did.

What happens next, in my opinion, is the best part of our story. 

At a time in Hagar's life when Hagar felt completely and utterly alone, an angel of the Lord found her. I could tell you what the angel of the Lord said to Hagar, but that is not nearly as important as the fact that when Hagar had no one to turn to and nowhere to run to, God saw her.

After Hagar and the Angel of the Lord spoke with one another, Hagar gives this name to the Lord, "You are the God who sees me," for she said, "I have now seen the One who sees me." (Genesis 16:13). 

Another name for the God who Sees me is El Roi.

This same God who saw Hagar also sees us. When we feel knocked down, alone and forgotten it's imperative that we run to God instead of running away from our circumstances. We must face the lies Satan is hurling at us head-on.

In Psalm 139 (vs. 1-12), David describes El Roi perfectly and beautifully:

"You have searched me and you know me. 
You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying down; 
you are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue 
you know it completely,
O Lord.

You hem me in--behind and before;
you have laid your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, 
too lofty for me to attain.
Where can I go from your Spirit?

Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.

If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me 
and the light become night around me," 
even the darkness will not be dark to you; 
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you."

If you are going through a season of feeling alone, forgotten, or unseen--I pray the God Who Sees will speak to your heart and flood you with the knowledge of His presence. 

Whether on the far side of the sea or in the depths He will never leave you nor forsake you.

The God Who Sees hears our prayers, comforts our spirits, and draws us gently into His loving embrace. 

His love never fails.

Stay the Course...

Sheila 

His Grace Is Sufficient

I used to be known as a die-hard New Year’s Goal Chic. I drove my friends crazy asking them what their 1 year, 3 year and 5- year goals were. Suffice it to say, we didn’t get invited to many New Year’s Eve parties!

Thankfully, somewhere in the midst of checking off goals and striving toward dreams, REAL life happened.

I will admit that it has taken a lot of years and many dark nights of the soul to recognize that God’s greatest gifts are best unwrapped in the solitude and darkness found in the valley.

More recently I spent some time in a dark valley of physical sickness. After several nights of no sleep, I became angry at my inability to feel productive. I finally realized that God needed my attention. Not for His benefit; but for mine.

“What do I need to learn that I’m clearly missing?!” I whispered angrily to Him after another long miserable night of no sleep (the sleep-deprived me is not the best version of me!). I was at the end of myself. He had my full attention.

Reflecting on my life, I saw the parallel of my striving to trust Him juxtaposed with my attempting to be self-sufficient. I realized that the ongoing tug-o-war between self-sufficiency and trusting Jehovah Jireh is a futile game of coming to the end of one’s self.

In II Corinthians Paul shares of his own afflictions. Afflictions which he pleaded with God three times to take away from him. He speaks about the thorn in his flesh, a messenger from Satan, sent to torment him.

God both heard and answered Paul’s prayer. God’s answer may not have been the answer Paul had hoped it would be. God said, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” (II Cor. 12:9). This verse refers to God as El Shaddai: The All-Sufficient One.

Only the Holy Spirit can repair and heal the areas of our lives that lack what is necessary to trust God fully. Our weaknesses allow Christ’s power to rest in us.

Jesus never lived a life chock full with New Year’s goals —because He did not live His life for Himself. His only goal was obedience to His Father.

Worldly goals are vain and empty. Living for oneself is not suggested ONE time as an option in the Word of God. An empowered man or woman is not one who strives to make something of his or her life because they are worth it. Rather, an empowered man or woman is one who makes nothing of his or her life. An empowered man or woman is one who recognizes his or her success lies in the knowledge that Christ’s power is most recognizable in one's weaknesses. 

It is a person who is able to recognize that everything we accomplish, every breath we spend, every gift we have been given is because of His grace and because HE and HE alone is worthy. Our only goal should be the same as Jesus—to live in obedience to the Father and do whatever HE asks us to do—for HIS glory, not our own.

So, no goals for this writer this year except to spend more time getting to know my Father and to gain a deeper understanding of His sufficient grace. A grace that annihilates the fear of failure and the need to be self-sufficient. A grace which reflects His perfect power not in spite of my weaknesses but because of my weaknesses. A grace which I am hoping will help me loosen my grip on the rope in the futile game of tug-o-war as I daily learn to trust Him more.

Oh for grace to trust Him more. 

Stay the Course...

Sheila

“He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” Psalm 91: 1& 2 

Caged Lion

(I wrote this blog 7 years ago and remembered it again after reading Francis Chan's newest book: Letters To The Church, where he speaks about us being caged lions. I believe I am not alone in my desire to break the patterns and thinking of society, both inside and outside of the church walls, so that each person can be uninhibited in becoming the person they were created to be in Christ.)

Wildly he paces back and forth on the worn path of his confined environment. He has room to move and stretch; but no room to do what he was created to do-- run. Time has fatigued his spirit, though memories of freedom often revisit him as he restlessly slumbers.

Passers-by stop at his man-made habitat, beholding his beauty, admiring his strength and size. Although he appears to be tame and broken; he is not. He cannot conform to the small cage and tasteless food for he knows that his identity lies beyond the boundaries of his closterphobic environment.

He attempts to rest beneath the shade of a tree amidst the clamor and commotion of the crowd. Cameras flash, shouts and whistles penetrate his space. His spirit fights within to not lash out. Though caged, he is fully able to scare even the bravest onlooker. However, the full wrath of his fury cannot be unleashed. Instead, turning his slouched body against the crowd, his sad eyes drop from view.

He remembers days of past when both his legs and his spirit thundered across the rolling plains; days when he was surrounded by those who knew him intimately. Respected within his pride, freedom was the aroma that surrounded his every breath. Fully alive, fully unleashed, fully living in the potential he was created to reach.  

Dying at the jaws of an enemy would be a welcome death compared to that of his spirit dying within him. The very essence of who he was born to be slowly fades as the daily demands of his new world rape him of his identity. Although his physical needs are met, the despair and loneliness in his chest ache beyond his ability to understand. He lies listless in the afternoon sun, waiting for nothing.

I am that caged lion; sad eyes, slouched shoulders. The world closes in, suffocating my spirit, begging me to match that which I was not created to match. I pace back and forth, restless and angry. I am a foreigner in a foreign land. Sleepless nights meet me. I question my Maker as to the true purpose of my existence. He looks at me and sees me as who He created to me be; but I am unable to see past my encaged environment.

I am unable to conform to my environment, unwilling to settle for complacency, uninterested in pretension, and unbelievably restless; an angry, pacing lion.  

I pray for humility. However, I also pray for boldness and courage to stay true to my God-created identity. I will not shrink back nor cower; for I and the lion are kindred-- both created to run wildly in total abandon, leaving behind no regrets. unleashing the spirit within and breaking free from the confines of our cages.  

Stay the Course...

Sheila Cote