Something strange and unexpected happened to me this
week.
With the 11 year anniversary of 9/11 came the
reflections and remembrance of an event that none will ever forget. Although each person in America was impacted
by the events of 9/11, one might say there were different levels of impact
depending on how close or distant one was to the tragic events of the day. Families were changed for a lifetime from an
event that appeared to last only moments.
Now, 11 years later, it seems that time has stood
still for some when listening to interviews of those who experienced the loss
of a son, daughter, husband, wife, mother or father. The pain is still so close to the surface
that words are unable to form when remembering that impactful day.
As I was praying and thinking about my own little
world of pain and trouble, I felt almost silly presenting myself before my
Father. In light of all the “real”
issues facing our country and in light of all the “real” struggles many people
are facing; I felt quite weak to not be handling my own tiny issues with
greater grace and strength.
However, on this particular day, I knew that I
needed time and intimacy with my Maker—so I locked the door to my bedroom and
knelt on the floor hoping words could adequate the emotions hiding in the basement
of my heavy soul.
I am unaware how much time passed, as time has a way
of passing quickly at the feet of the Throne of Grace. Eventually I landed in the fetal position as
I admitted my inability to fix myself or to make myself better.
It’s not often that I hear God speak to my heart;
sometimes His voice can be confused with my own thoughts. On this morning, however, He spoke and I
heard His voice with perfect clarity, “Rest, weary Soldier.”
At first I was confused because I have not tackled fearless
feats such as running into burning buildings to rescue victims. Nonetheless, God’s Spirit flooded my
heart. I realized that God does not
treat us nor respond to us by measuring us against a scale reflecting different
levels of pain or hurt. Whether or not
our hearts have been wounded by a public loss or a loss that is known only to ourselves,
the pain is ever real and can only be healed by our Father.
God is unable and unwilling to view us through a
lens of unworthiness just because the world does not know our name or because we
do not carry a title. He is now, and
forever will be, unmoved by another's view or opinion of us. It is only His opinion that matters and only
He who can bring change to a heart that seeks Him and longs to know Him.
Perhaps you, too, are a weary soldier, longing to
find rest for your soul. “Come to me,
all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest,” says our Father.
(Mt. 11:28)
I do not know how it happened, but as I humbled
myself in His presence and accepted His offer of rest, I was refreshed.
Whatever road you are traveling, whatever the shape
or the size of your trial, you are not hidden from your Father. As your heart longs for His heart, so does He
long for you.
You need only carry your burdens to the feet of
Jesus; He will meet you at the Throne of Grace.
“Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we
may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” (Hebrews
4:16)
Rest, weary Soldier.
Stay the Course...
Sheila Cote'
